Are you stuck? Are you stuck in your health, your marriage, your career, your finances, your spirituality, your recreation, or any other area? Stuckness can happen for any number of reasons:
An unwise choice (or series of unwise choices) you made
Seasonal depression
The stuck ass people you hang around
Homeostasis
The death of a loved one
Poor self image or self talk
The amount of sleep you get
The food you put into your body
Enter almost anything here
You get the picture. You can and will likely get stuck from time to time depending on a million different reasons and scenarios. The reasons why don't matter. All that matters is that you get unstuck, and there are only 2 ways to get unstuck:
1. Waiting & hoping
2. Intentional personal growth
Waiting and hoping can sometimes lead to getting unstuck. You might feel super unmotivated around "burnout season", as I refer to it (October/ November), but the New Year rolls around and boom! A sudden burst of motivation gets you unstuck. "This year will be so different! I can feel it," you say, "I waited, and I hoped, and boom! It worked like magic! It's a miracle" And then what happens? You take a nose dive into the sand 2 weeks later. Patience & hope isn't a strategy.
There is another way, that I'd suggest is a better way, and it is through intentional personal growth.
Personal Growth is a process of self discovery and transformation. It's a process of auditing and editing your life, from the inside out: from your vision, to your mindset to your beliefs, habits, behaviors, actions, and even reactions. It isn't fast, and it definitely is not pretty, but it has the power to change everything in the most beautiful of ways.
You see, most of us live our lives by default, allowing (or resisting) anything that comes at us. We don't put intentional focus into what we're reading, watching, listening to, doing, eating, saying, etc. That is one way to live, and it is also a solid way to get yourself stuck in concrete. You may not see it yet, but you will if you choose to self discover. You are stuck in your thinking, your habits, your mood, your job, your inner circle. If you are not growing, those points of stuckness can turn into an anchor in your life, It is also said a little more intensely as, "If you're not growing, you're dying."
...Which by the way is totally fine. Most people live this way, and get along perfectly well, going from crisis to crisis, from stuck point to stuck point. There is no judgement around that, yet make no mistake YOU CHOOSE that, like one of our favorite groms, Dalton Trip (pictured above) illustrates for us. Your life is a made up of a series of choices. You can choose to live by default, or you can choose to live a life by design (you design your life), but either way, it is a choice you make. This translates from business to home life, from relationships, to your spiritual growth, and beyond.
NY Times Bestselling Author of 70+ books, world renown Speaker, Teacher, & Pastor John Maxwell writes that there are three types of people, when it comes to having direction in life. (Page 18 of John Maxwell's The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth, a.k.a the bible of personal growth):
People who don't know what they would like to do: These people are often confused. They lack a strong sense of purpose. They don't possess a sense of direction in their lives. If they are growing, they are unfocused about it. They dabble. They drift. They can't reach their potential because they have no idea what to shoot for.
People who know what they would like to do but don't do it. These people are usually frustrated. Every day, they experience the gap between where they are and where they want to be. Sometimes, they aren't doing what they want, because they worry that it will cause them to neglect other responsibilities, such as providing for their families. Sometimes they aren't willing to pay the price to learn, grow, and move closer to where they want to be. Other times fear prevents them from changing course to pursue their passion. No matter what the reason, they too miss their potential.
People who know what they would like to do and do it. The third kind of people know themselves, possess a strong sense of passion, are focused in purpose, grow in areas that help them move closer to their purpose, and do what they were created to do. The word that best describes them is.... fulfilled.
Which number do you fall into? Listen, Rockstar, I have no skin in this game. This is introspection, or inner reflection, and we will be doing a lot more of this type of deep internal work this year, here in The Rockstar Blog. There is no judgement around this, but I have a calling on my own life to call out the best in you, even from my office keyboard. It is my purpose, and why I believe I've made soooooo many stupid mistakes and learned so many lessons from them, along my journey of self discovery & growth... to share it with you. To connect you to your own journey, to support your in your growth, and to empower you to take charge of your life.
I believe this whole heartedly: You wouldn't be reading this blogpost right now and wouldn't be feeling that inner spark or gnawing sensation in your gut (note: could also feel like defensiveness), if God did not create an appointment with you today, to bring your awareness to your own life, I read an awesome quote recently that just came to my mind as I typed that last sentence. There is debate over whether it was said by the Buddha or an unknown source, but it says:
"When the student is ready, the teacher will appear."
There is more FOR you in this life, and there is more IN you. I know it, and YOU know it. You're reading this for a purpose, and I believe that purpose is to begin taking steps to grow in your life. Which area(s) will you focus on this year?
Spirituality
Health (mental, physical, emotional)
Marriage/ Romance
Family/ Parenting
Friendships
Wealth Building and/or Giving (psst 2 sides of the same coin.)
Career
Fun & Recreation
Environment
Education
So what's next? Maybe you read this and you are thinking to yourself "Okay well I know that I want to make change in my life. Now what?" I've have created a 12 month long teaching series on different areas of personal growth which I'll be sharing in The Rockstar Community: here on the blog, in Rockstar Moms of the Jersey Shore, on Insta, and email. My goal is to connect, support, and empower your in your own growth journey this year and my deepest prayer is that you will see major transformation in one or more areas of your life. Remember results come from action. Nothing else. As much as you put into your own growth is as much as you'll get out of it. It's an investment. There is no stockbroker who will tell you about the incredible returns he has seen from people who never invested or invested very little. If growth is what you want, you're in the right place. Get ready to get uncomfortable. It is time to get pushed, like little Grom Kenny Trip (pictured below), getting pushed by his Uncle, Ryan Trip, into the wave. We're your Ryan. Get ready, Kenny! We will push, you take it from there!
I've designed the teaching series to begin with a 5 week step by step process to explore, discover, reflect, plan, and then get into action. This isn't a comprehensive deep dive into every area of personal growth. It is designed to be the lead domino that when flicked, sets off a whole series of dominoes after. I will teach you the things, and make you laugh & identify with all of my failures, but you must then carry the lessons into your own life and cultivate change. Are you ready? If you haven't yet, check out the other blogs in our Intro to Growth teaching/ blog series:
1. EXPLORE: 12 Transformations I Experienced In My Growth Journey.
2. DISCOVER: What A Personal Growth Is & Why You Need It Now
3. REFLECT: 8 Growth Gaps That Keep Us From Growing
4. PLAN: How to Create a Growth Plan
5. TAKE ACTION: (coming soon)
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